


Pain

by moricat



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Romantic Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-29
Updated: 2016-11-29
Packaged: 2018-09-03 02:17:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,035
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8692534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moricat/pseuds/moricat
Summary: The missing Eremin comfort scene between chapters 54 and 55.~    Obviously TW: mentions of child sexual assault as is in the manga!!!! For Eremin weeks’ day 10: Hurt/Comfort





	

Everyone in the new squad Levi stood around in the hide out, brimming with anticipation for the reveal. Sasha and Connie gossiped with amusement at Jean once again donning the Eren costume and shamelessly discussed Armin’s new Christa uniform they looked forward to seeing.

Eren on the other hand stood leaned up against the wall, quietly awaiting Armin’s reveal. His arms were crossed, finger tapping against his skin, as he stared at the ground, running the plan through his head over and over again, not comfortable in the slightest with the position given to Armin…  Mikasa stood still, watching him from the side…

Finally, the boudoir door opened, revealing Jean bitterly dressed as his least favorite person again. He trudged towards the hallway, accompanied by laughter from Sasha, and passed by Eren, glaring with contempt at him. Mikasa glared in return while Eren remained fixated on the door.

In another few seconds, Armin walked out. His gaze was to the floor, a blush crowning his cheeks, and he walked with a brave stride.

“Holy shit!” Connie shouted “You’re a perfect model, Armin!”

Sasha harmoniously joined in, pulling at Armin’s skirt. “I’ve never seen anyone model a skirt so perfectly, that color is astounding on you!”

“Aw man, I wonder what he’d look like in a full on ball gown?!!” Connie wondered as he ran his fingers through the wig and played with the strands on it.

Sweat began to pool over Armin’s brow.

“What a thought! Armin, when you get back, can you try on one of my outfits?--”

 **“OI, SHUT UP!”** A growling voice demanded.

Suddenly Armin was pulled away by the arm and found himself by Eren.

Without missing a beat in his intervention, Eren continued. “He’s not some play thing, this is a serious undercover operation, I’d like to see you show the same courage and dedication!”

Armin calmly removed Eren’s hand and spoke for himself. “It’s alright, Eren. You just focus on what you have to do.”

“That’s right. You stay hidden.” Mikasa ordered in agreement.

With that, Armin left the room and took himself into the hall to wait with Jean.

Within a few minutes the rest of the squad, (minus Historia and Eren), were all standing in the hall by the doorway preparing to leave. They reviewed the next steps to each other in whispers and with a determined composure began filing out the door in proper order, one by one.

Armin watched all of his comrades leave before him when he was suddenly grabbed from behind into a tight hug. He recognized the culprit as Eren right away.

His arms holding him close, very afraid to let him slip away into danger again, Eren finally spoke from Armin’s shoulder. “Come back safe…”

Armin turned around, raising Eren’s head up to look at him and gave him a hopeful smile. “Everything’s gonna be alright, Eren. You just worry about your parts.”

Eren still couldn’t swallow the situation. “Please… promise me… you’ll come back, safe…”

Armin’s smile disappeared. He refused to lie to him no matter what was happening. “Just wait here. Stay hidden, stay quiet, stay safe… We should be back before nightfall.” He grasped Eren’s shoulder to comfort him.

Still, the lump that had formed in Eren’s throat ached on. He simply hoped Armin would forgive him for being unable to smile to reassure him in this state…

Jean finally looked over from the window as he watched and waited for the signal to leave. “Armin. Let’s go.”  

“Yes.” Armin obeyed and followed Jean out the door, feeling Eren’s hands trail over his arm and his hand until he was out of his reach…

–

The sound of an approaching carriage rolling on the road outside filled Eren’s worried ears. He jumped out of his seat in a rush to look out the window. “They’re back!” He ran to the doorway, praying to himself.  “Please, please, please, please, please,…”

The heavy door squeaked open as one by one the tired squad entered… Jean’s eyes read shock, Mikasa’s pity, Sasha and Connie’s seemed to be more or less the same as when they left… and finally Armin walked inside.

“Armin!” Eren cried, as he threw his arms around the wonderful man before him. “Thank God, you’re al–”

A frightened and anxious look appeared in Armin’s blank eyes as he pushed Eren off of him.

Eren looked on in confusion, seemingly hurt by the gesture.

Realizing what he’d just done, Armin covered his mouth with his hand, and simply ran off into the washroom, closing the door behind him.

“Armin!” Eren immediately started to follow, but a pair of strong hands grasping his arm stopped him in place.

“Don’t. Leave him alone for now.” Mikasa spoke coldly but softly.  

“What are you doing?!” Eren shouted, trying to escape. “I have to go talk to him, he needs me--”

“Not right now.” She insisted.

“Why not?! What happened?!”

She pulled him down to her face to whisper in his ear…

Eren appeared shocked and wholly regretful to find out the truth…

–

For the rest of the evening, Eren and Mikasa stood clear of Armin, respecting his space but still feeling upset for him. Jean tried to console him while less mindful people chortled at the reaction of the pervert upon finding out the truth of his sex. All of which almost seemed to be intended to make it worse for poor Armin, who simply sobbed quietly until he was free to hide in the bedroom for the rest of the evening.

Dinner time rolled in eventually and Eren, with a tray of food in hand, made his way to the bedroom door. He knocked carefully. “Armin? It’s just me. I brought your dinner rations…” He listened for an answer and finding no response, he opened the door. The room was quiet, chilled, and completely darkened, save for the moonlight coming in from the window over the sil where Armin sat, arms around his knees, hugging them to his chest, and staring outside at the night sky… Eren approached calmly and cautiously, and spoke with a soft and gentle tone, as he carried the tray over to him. “Soup’s on…”

Silence.

“I understand, you’re- probably not hungry right now. I’ll set it aside for later…” He placed the tray on the table and simply looked at Armin, who never once looked up from his gaze outside. “…I’m sorry. You should never have had to go through that…” He reached out, instinctively wanting to touch his shoulder and offer his comfort but sadly retreated his hand, remembering Armin’s reaction earlier. “You don’t have to talk about it. But I’m here for you if you need anything, okay?…” Eren stood waiting but received no response, and so finally turned around and began to leave. “Good night…”

… “Do you think I’m dirty?…” Armin’s pitiful, cracking voice broke the silence and stopped Eren in his tracks.

He turned around and quickly went over to take a seat by Armin. “No, of course not…” He answered, freely running his hands over his shoulders.

Armin began to cry and buried his face in his knees. “Do you think I’m _tainted_?”

Heartbroken at the sight and the question, Eren lifted Armin’s arms up and pulled his body into his warm embrace. “No, no, you’re not tainted…”

Armin sobbed against Eren’s shoulder, but refused to hug him back. “It was so awful… violating and humiliating… I wanted to die just so it would end…”

Eren held him tighter. “I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry… But it’s- it’s all over now…”

Armin rose up and broke away, sniffling as he wiped his nose. “… When… when we ambushed those guys… and managed to take them down… our disguises were removed, and– the one who touched me spoke to me… he said that I– had perverted him…”

Eren listened with disgust.

“That I had made him… abnormal… I felt so dirty…” the sobs returned. “I feel so disgusting… I wonder if I was made abnormal too… Tainted.”

“Fuck that guy!” Eren shouted as his hand swiped the empty air. “Don’t listen to him, Armin! That guy is just scum and you have nothing to do with it!”

Armin looked at him through his tears.

“You did not pervert anyone. He perverted himself, alright? _HE_  was the one who had slimy perverted thoughts and he took them out on you… He’s lower than rabid dogs and dirt! Don’t validate him by letting any of that get to you.”

Armin listened intently, trying to believe him.

“You’re not tainted… He didn’t take anything away from you. Don’t let yourself think that he did. You’re still you, Armin. That hasn’t changed over the acts of an inhuman piece of shit like him. Who you are is up to you. And what you’re made of is still there. Don’t _let_ him take any of that away from you…”

Armin’s tears stopped as he listened and heard Eren’s words. “Alright…”

“…And I certainly don’t look at you any differently…”

Armin’s face scrunched as he brought a hand over his mouth to force the sobs from coming out again.

“Come here…” Eren reached out for him again and Armin finally hugged him back.

Within a moment, the tears fell again… Armin buried his face in Eren’s chest as Eren held him close, petting him, whispering gentle words, and running his hands through his hair to soothe him. “It’s okay… Everything’s gonna be okay…”

Armin wanted to apologize but struggled to speak amidst his sobbing. He hated crying in front of Eren. Even at a time like this. “ _E-e-r-en…_ ”

“Shhh… I’m here. I’m right here… And so are you. Everything’s okay. You’re safe right now. Right here with me. Don’t worry…” Eren’s low voice was like a lullaby to his crying companion’s ears. He left a gentle kiss on Armin’s head, hoping he didn’t feel it, as he rested his muzzle against his hair.  

Armin’s hug grew tighter as he tried to swallow the urge to cry any further. “Eren…”

“Hmm?”

“I’m so glad you’re here… I’m glad we’ve made it this far, together…”

Eren smiled to himself. “You too…” He pulled away to look at Armin with a confident smile. “And we’re going to make it all the way outside together too… We _definitely_ will.”

Armin inhaled the chill air as Eren’s smile washed over him, calming his anxieties and reinspiring the courage in him. His eyes finally began to sparkle once again. “…Yeah. We _definitely_ will…”

Eren made himself comfortable in the window sil and took Armin back into his arms, keeping him warm and loved as they looked at the stars until Armin was ready to sleep…

–

The next day, squad Levi sat around trying not to listen to the torture going on in the dungeons below… All wondering if they could successfully overthrow the government… and if they could go through with hurting _people_ …

Armin lamented. “We absolutely might. In fact there’s no choice. Casualties will be inevitable no matter what… In fact it’s such an impossible task, we may need to manipulate the populace. Stage an accident of some kind and blame it on the government. I’m sure they’ll be easy to fool…”

The stares everyone shot at Armin shocked even himself as he processed what he’d just suggested…

“I’m just saying!” He grinned awkwardly.

“Armin, you were tainted after that pervert touched you.” Jean declared.  

Eren interrupted him defensively. “No, Armin’s always been good at coming up with devious plans!”

Armin smiled underneath his embarrassment… Eren knew him even better than he knew himself. He may need to get his hands dirty… hurt people… lie… but he refused to let any future ugly deeds take anything away from who he was…  

* * *

 

> (Lol, to lighten the mood, _**later**_ …

> Jean was on watch duty that night, easily staying awake as he gagged watching Armin and Eren sleep so close to each other. Maybe the pervert changed Armin and maybe he didn’t, but _that_ sure hadn’t changed… Armin stirred in his sleep and the half conscious Eren suddenly cuddled him even closer. At this, a queasy Jean decided it was time to wake up Connie for his shift…)


End file.
